All that Glimmers

The holidays are a time for glimmers.  By that, I don’t mean glitter and garland and all things shiny, although they may be a part of your celebrations.  I mean an experience that Deb Dana offered up in her 2021 book, Anchored: How to Befriend Your Nervous System Using Polyvagal Theory.  Although that is a rather daunting title, glimmers are not complex, and they have wonderful benefits.  I invite you to share the idea of glimmers with your family this holiday season so that your children can experience them, too! 

Deb Dana says, “Polyvagal Theory is the science of feeling safe enough to fall in love with life and take the risks of living.”  That makes the title of her book a little more relatable!  She also says, “We come into the world wired for connection.  With our first breath we embark on a lifelong quest to feel safe in our bodies, in our environments, and in our relationships with others.  As my colleague Stephen Porges [who developed Polyvagal Theory] has often expressed to me, our longing is not simply to feel safe but to feel safe in the arms of another.”  

The holidays are all about your connections with yourself, your loved ones, your community, and your faith.  It is a time of embracing one another with warmth and care.  Glimmers can enhance that experience. 

Glimmers are micro-moments of heightened connection, safety, and nourishment.  Dana writes, “Glimmers are all around us, but from a state of protection they are very hard to find.  Even when we are anchored in safety and connection, we can miss glimmers if we’re not looking.  We have to actively look for, take notice of, and keep track of these moments, or micro-moments, of safety and connection that are our glimmers.” 

Dana says that she is aware of a glimmer by “a feeling of softening around my eyes and the beginning of a smile.”  You may feel it in your body and through your senses.  Pause to witness the experience you are having.  Glimmers may be fleeting, yet they can be very nourishing. 

A glimmer can be the time you say “Ahhh!” when you hold a match to a candle and see where it then both sheds its light and creates shadows.  It can be the “wow” as you stand under the trees in the Plaza as they flip the switch to illuminate the night with holiday lights.  It can be the aroma of cider where you experience whiffs of orange and cinnamon as well as the warmth of the first sips.  

Set an intention to notice glimmers each day.  The holidays offer so many beautiful opportunities.  Here are some more places to notice: 

·       Experiencing the beauty of a choir or choral group

·       Tasting your favorite holiday treat

·       Hearing and feeling the crunching of snow under your feet as you walk

·       Feeling the warmth when you come inside after being in the cold outside

·       Feeling the coldness of your first inhale when you walk outside

·       Seeing the holiday decorations in store windows

·       Noticing the smiles on the faces of people you pass

·       Smelling and tasting your first cup of coffee or tea in the morning

·       Seeing your child’s face as they open presents

·       Smelling the piñon smoke from fireplaces

·       Seeing the sun glisten on snow

·       Watching your dog frolic in the snow 

Take a moment to experience your glimmer.  See, feel, taste, hear, and smell.  Let it settle into your body.  Fill your cup! 

It is these small moments that bring gratitude, that secure us in safety, and that enrich and bring depth to life.   

Happiest of holidays and may you have many glimmers!